Life beyond the life

Life beyond the life of my child

Life beyond the life : good evening everyone, I am about to tell you something that I have been carrying inside me for the last 20 years, before I had my son, I had lost two twins while I was 5 and 6 months pregnant, you can not imagine the wound that the loss left within me, and yet, life had to go on and so I became pregnant again.

After about three and half years, one night, it was about three thirty am, my husband and I heard a distinct call from our son’s bedroom, Mum, mum, my husband called me, because I was taking a while to get up, and so, I stumbled to my son’s bedroom, I walked in, and there was a little green light on the bedside stand, I saw my son from behind, facing the night stand I believe, he was wearing a little checkered kindergarten smock, I walked toward him to pick him up and put him back to bed, I started gently scalding him for being a sleepwalker and playing kindergarten school in the middle of the night, but then he turned around and smiled, it was not my little Federico, for he was still sleeping soundly in his bed, this was a little boy who looked like him, and after a big, long smile, he just disappeared.

You can not imagine the bewilderment, I went back to my bedroom and asked my husband if he had actually heard Federico calling me, and he confirmed that he did, the following morning, during breakfast, my son told me, “you know, mum, last night my little brother came to visit me, he said that he died and that you suffer a lot, but that you don’t need to worry, and you mustn’t cry because he will always be with me and will never leave me”

I was speechless, he did not know about this family event, he went back to play and never mentioned it again.

This story left me completely upset, and it added to the never healed wound of losing two twins, 5 years went by, the day of my 40th birthday, that day I was at the seaside, I had tried unsuccessfully to find myself a birthday gift with my husband, in the afternoon, as I was strolling in a very popular art show, featuring many nice paintings, suddenly a little picture frame grabbed my attention, the actual frame was beautiful, baroque style, you could not imagine the shock and the joy at seeing once again the very same face of the little cherub, with a little crown made of pink roses, looking at me, just like he had done that night, five years prior, it was the same face of the same boy, with long blonde curls.

I bought that ‘cameo’, I paid dearly for it, it was my fortieth birthday gift, and it was of the little boy I never met although I carried him in my womb for six and a half months, together with the other one who died in the same sack, I put it next to my bed and I never suffered from the loss ever since.

Thank you for listening to me

Life beyond the life of my child are the words from Adele

Life beyond the life of my child

Life beyond the life